This feeling of vague restlessness and discontent with life. Is it wrong not to want what mundane existence offers, but i guess it will be too much for me.
Overestimation, exaggeration is all I can see now - in my own attitude, in the people around me.
It's not that I'm not happy, but my happiness is unstable, short-lived. And then I realise... the reason why I am happy is just in my dreams.. it's not reality.
I have this tendency of walking around all day with my head in the clouds and throwing practical considerations out the window. Hope I don't do that this time.
Responsibilities weighing heavily on my shoulders? No. At least I think so. But even simple stuff seems to need enormous effort. Unfortunately, I just cannot abandon these jobs.
I don't get this "promise" thing. We promise shitload to other people everyday. At least think about it once or twice before promising something to someone else. It's a horrible thing to promise more than you can deliver, as we are unlikely to be able to follow through on "all our promises" and then people count on us to deliver, which is what makes the situation even more oppressive.
You know you seem arrogant, boastful, wasteful, extravagant to me. But hey you also show awesome creative power.
All my life these "authority figures" "respected elders" have been discouraging to me. I don't take them personally anymore. They’re probably suffering from some fuckload of alien diseases which scientists are yet to discover.
I guess it's time to get some distance from a troubled relationship. Instead of sticking things out with selfish, demanding people, I'm better off going solo.Fuck this shit. I just want to order some delicious takeaway, marinate myself in a scented bath or get a massage maybe or blast some hip hop into my ears and not get involved in somebody else’s fight.
Okay? Okay.
Overestimation, exaggeration is all I can see now - in my own attitude, in the people around me.
It's not that I'm not happy, but my happiness is unstable, short-lived. And then I realise... the reason why I am happy is just in my dreams.. it's not reality.
I have this tendency of walking around all day with my head in the clouds and throwing practical considerations out the window. Hope I don't do that this time.
Responsibilities weighing heavily on my shoulders? No. At least I think so. But even simple stuff seems to need enormous effort. Unfortunately, I just cannot abandon these jobs.
I don't get this "promise" thing. We promise shitload to other people everyday. At least think about it once or twice before promising something to someone else. It's a horrible thing to promise more than you can deliver, as we are unlikely to be able to follow through on "all our promises" and then people count on us to deliver, which is what makes the situation even more oppressive.
You know you seem arrogant, boastful, wasteful, extravagant to me. But hey you also show awesome creative power.
All my life these "authority figures" "respected elders" have been discouraging to me. I don't take them personally anymore. They’re probably suffering from some fuckload of alien diseases which scientists are yet to discover.
I guess it's time to get some distance from a troubled relationship. Instead of sticking things out with selfish, demanding people, I'm better off going solo.Fuck this shit. I just want to order some delicious takeaway, marinate myself in a scented bath or get a massage maybe or blast some hip hop into my ears and not get involved in somebody else’s fight.
Okay? Okay.
